September 29, 2009

When in Provo…

BYU’s humiliating defeat by Florida State University is old news and I hate to reopen the wound by bringing it up again, however…

 

The Sunday after the game, I went for a walk around campus. Chalk notes like this were scrawled in several different places. The scripture reference, Doctrine and Covenants 123:13 reads:

Therefore, that we should waste and wear out our lives in bringing to light all the hidden things of darkness, wherein we know them; and they are truly manifest from heaven…

I don’t really know what this has to do with the game, but the rest of the section tells us that whoever wrote this was very passionate about what had happened.

This one has a special message for Max Hall…

Oh Provo…what are we going to do with you.

September 25, 2009

Ceci n’est pas une femme.

As all of the BYUers, UVUers and Beauty Schoolers settle in for another school year, one question remains. Where will they party? Well, seeing as Provo law seems to demand that all music stop at midnight, whether it’s bothering someone or not, it appears they will have to go to The Loft! Everyone has been getting flyers for it throughout the past month.

While I was staring at this flyer, trying to make sense of it I saw a couple problems.

1. Ladies Night!

Woohoo! Eevery Wednesday night is ladies night but wait…a 2 for 1 coupon? In my experience with ladies nights (which is basically the commercials I’ve heard on Seattle radio stations) they are FREE for ladies. Not only are they free, but women get like half price drinks and food…or something like that. Isn’t the logic that if they can get more girls to come, more guys will come too? So shouldn’t they be able to get in free all night and not just for the first half hour as their site says?

2. 80s Night

There is nothing girls like to do more than put on really weird clothes and makeup and say that they look like they are from the 80s. A simple “Family Ties” and “ALF” marathon could teach you that. Then again, you could dress like Madonna, but I’m pretty sure the dress code (which another flyer told me was “strictly enforced”) wouldn’t let you. Want some more accurate ideas?

 

3. The Person in the Yellow Pants

Is it just me or is that a man? Does “she” know that ladies night is going to cost her anyway?

man

September 23, 2009

A Little Something for the Believers

I don’t like Kanye West, and I never have. The best thing about him is that he is so easy to make fun of, it’s super funny when he is made fun of, and unlike some stars, he seems to get mad about every thing that everyone says about him.

By: Me

September 22, 2009

What’s In A Meme

While I was on FaceBook yesterday, I was pleased to see a quiz going around my friends that would determine which Mount Si High School staff member I was most like. There were only five results (how did they narrow it down?) but it was still fun. In response to this quiz, others wanted to create quizzes with other teachers. While I was trying to help them figure out teachers (it’s amazing how much you forget when you don’t see them every day…and when you have a head injury), I stumbled across this little gem:

Thanks for uploading Russell Millard!

Now that you’ve watched that, would you say it deserves to be a meme? I think it does. I mean, I posted it on FaceBook, then everyone else started posting it and it went from about 40 to 180 views in one day. Sure, I don’t think it’s the next Zero Wing, or Daft Hands, but it could be the next What You Know About Math for sure, if it tries hard enough. However, I do think it needs a catchier title.



Also, if you are an "All Your Base" type of person, check out the live action video HERE. This was done by guys I went to high school with.

September 14, 2009

Like A Whirlpool, It Never Ends

For those of you not familiar with your oldies music, that is “Dizzy” by Tommy Roe. That is also how my head has felt for the past week and a half. For a long time I thought it was just dehydration or left over sickness from before I got my wisdom teeth out. I was wrong.

Lets take a look back at this past week. While I had felt nausea and headaches increasing for some time, this past week I started to notice some things that were…odd. It started when I could no longer read street signs. Not the big speed limit ones, but the small ones with the actual streets on them (a vital thing to be able to see when you have little clue of where you are). Reading signs displayed on the wall was also difficult sometimes. Most of the time it was just after working out, so I chalked it up to being hungry. The next thing I noticed, was the gradual decline of my parking a driving skill. As the week went on, I began parking more and more crooked. I would get out of my car and just stare. I was sure I had done it perfectly. On Saturday, I was parked pretty much at a 45 degree angle from the curb…in a spot that should have been 90. I also began slowing down at green lights, taking turns a little crazier than I normally would have and just generally not doing as well. The more I tried harder to do better, the worse it got.

Skip to today.

This morning I woke up and I was just fine. I had decided to wake up a little early so I could take my time getting ready and getting to class, but soon I began to feel an all too familiar feeling. By the time I opened the door to leave, I felt like I had just gotten off of the a teacup ride. I drove to school and called a doctor’s office to see if I could get an appointment for Tuesday or Thursday, but no. They were booked for five months (even the doctor who had just started). I decided I couldn’t wait any more and went to the ER.

This was very helpful. Sure, my care wasn’t quite as immediate as when I went to the ER previously, but I was only in the waiting room for about seven minutes. I got an awesome bracelet, and I even got to choose what color of gauze I received after the nurse took some blood (I chose pink).

I blurred the info out, but it’s embossed and everything!

I was able to watch TV, but a crazy long lasting storm warning started scrolling across the screen and it made me a little sick, so I fell asleep. I should also mention that I had a CAT scan at some point (and I didn’t even have to walk to the room to get it).

The final diagnosis is that I’ve had a concussion and that I’m still healing, which the doctor said could take a few more weeks to a few months. I got some medication to help with my nausea (or “our nausea”) as well as a referral to a concussion clinic that I have an appointment at on Thursday.

Other highlights of the day include:

When I got back out to my car after the ER visit was over, the parking spot next to me was full of vomit. It grossed me out, but I figured, at least I’ve got it better than that guy! My phone died right as I tried to take a picture, so you have all been spared the horror.

When I came out of Albertsons (obviously looking like I had just been to the hospital, complete with bracelet, gauze arm, and a generally frazzled appearance) a bum asked me for change. I said, “No I don’t have any change!” I’m not even kidding. It kind of reminded me of how much “Intervention” I’ve been watching lately…but it’s weirder when they are asking you for money.

That was my day today. By the way, this got left out. The concussion is from when I hit my head about a month ago.

Okay, now I’m done.

September 13, 2009

What’s Wrong With This Picture?

You forgot something!

Imagine, you are walking down the card and magazine isle at the store looking for the most obnoxious music card when the latest issue of “Martha Stewart Living” catches your eye. “What the what? No pants!?!” you think to yourself. Then you realize that she is just wearing skin colored (er…peach?) pants. (Or does she have khaki skin?)

The only thing creepier are her covers for Halloween issues.